VENT

Okay, so I need to vent. I have a hot button - and whenever anyone pushes it, even unknowingly, I can feel the coils of my brain turn red hot, and smoke tendrils start leaking from my nose and ears.... Someone says that Jordan is SPOILED, even in jest, and I lose my sense of humor.

How in the world can a 6 month old baby be spoiled????

Wikipedia's definition of SPOILED is to diminish or impair the quality of something; to affect detrimentally. This in NO WAY describes Jordan.

The University of Michigan Health System describes a spoiled child as undisciplined, manipulative, and unpleasant to be with much of the time. This in NO WAY describes Jordan.

A spoiled chiled behaves in many of the following ways by the time he is 2 or 3 years old:
Doesn't follow rules or cooperate with suggestions.
Doesn't respond to "no," "stop," or other commands.
Protests everything.
Doesn't know the difference between his needs and his wishes.
Insists on having his own way.
Makes unfair or excessive demands on others.
Doesn't respect other people's rights.
Tries to control people.
Has a low tolerance for frustration.
Frequently whines or throws tantrums.
Constantly complains about being bored.

I agree with both the definition, and the description. NEITHER one describes Jordan, not even close. Heck, they couldn't describe Jordan, because she isn't developmentally able to do most of those things yet.

People tend to say that she is spoiled because she cries, about pretty much anything. When she cries because she wants to fall asleep in bed with me, or in someone's arms, she must be spoiled. When she cries because she is dealing with a typical developmental milestone (separation anxiety) she is spoiled. When she cries because she wants to be held rather than sit on the floor and play by herself, she must be spoiled. MALARCHY!!!!!

I can never understand why people think that I must let my baby cry - or else I will spoil her. When she is 2 years old, and she can communicate, when she remembers people that she doesn't see all of the time; when she is beginning to understand consequences and when is old enough to move around and make herself comfortable and entertain herself, THEN I can begin to consider whether or not she is spoiled. NOT at 6 months old.

I just about fly off of the handle every time I hear it - but I just hold things together, clamp my lips shut, and let it pass, although my brain sizzles and my hands shake... BJ and I have had a few knock down drag outs over this very topic - but my stance is firm. NO ONE can make me believe that ANY child who can not yet communicate, could be spoiled. High needs, sure. Clingy, sure. Tempremental, sure. But SPOILED? Hell no.

Just needed to get that out. I'm not sure whether I feel better, or more riled up than when I started. :)