Friday

Today is Friday. Today is a Friday that I managed to escape work early. My husband and I went to Applebees, and had hot wings and a beer. It was UNBELIEVABLY nice. We had a real live uninterrupted adult conversation, or two or even three - and I was able to nibble my chicken without tearing off slivers for Jordan, and was able to drink my beer and watch the other people in the establisment in a way that only a person without a child can. No picking up toys that are thrown on the floor, and frantically using a baby wipe to disinfect reasonably enough to feel okay about giving it back to the baby, only to have her instantly throw it on the floor again (fetch is a current favorite game). No worries about every smile when there is a mouthful of food, no conditioned flinching response in preparation for a shower of finely 'gummed' brocolli as it flies out of a laughing babies mouth and ends up all over mommy's face, hair, and personal plate of food... What I'm getting at here people, is that it was a very nice evening at Applebees - one in which I relished being 'baby-less', and remembered all of the good times that BJ and I had pre-Jordan. I became a little nostalgic, and missed those days... As we all do every now an again.
UNTIL
I walked in the door of daycare, and saw the biggest smile light up the face of my daughter, and heard her squeal of delight and saw her anxious crawl towards me... In that moment I instantly forgot about Applebees, and all of the times prior. The only thing that mattered was this perfect baby, and the overwhelming love that gushed from my being as soon as I laid eyes on her!
Even now, as I sit in my kitchen, I no longer long for the 'old days'. Even though before I could sit in this chair I had to move out of the way the Twighlight Turtle and the Toolbench that need new batteries, the 3 sweaters and one hat, the rag we use to wipe up snot bubbles, the book with the torn off 'lift the flap' that needs to be glued back on, and the bajillion twisty ties from the last toy that we bought and opened up to be enjoyed. Even when I look at the kitchen and see a sack of yogurt melts, a package of ritz crakers, 3 sippy cups, each partly full, a bag of dirty bottles and baby food cubes from day care, and a snot rag on the table; not to mention the pea coat and hat (size 18 mo) hanging on the corner of one chair, and the lovey that needs washed draped over the back of another, a bag of new diapers on the floor nearby that were lately used as a drum, and about 4 rolly toys scattered across the floor..... Am I getting the mess across? Because it IS a mess, and a big one... And it is generally every night. But even the mess makes me sentimental when I consider that it is all due to my perfect baby. (Meanwhile I try to block the realization that I am drinking a glass of wine and blogging rather than cleaning up this mess).
Amazingly, I'm glad to have given up all of the "free" days. I'm willing to deal with the disaster in our house. I'm so excited to watch my baby girl grow and learn. She is my new life. :)
'SIGH'
And now that I've spilled a bit of that which overfloweth my cup, I suppose I should get started on cleaning up this mess.
Thanks for listening. :)